


Luxury

by jenniferjun1per



Series: Jyn Erso Week [2]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Post-Battle of Scarif, Pre-Relationship, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2017-05-23
Packaged: 2018-11-03 21:25:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10975623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenniferjun1per/pseuds/jenniferjun1per
Summary: Everyone Jyn has cared for has always left her. She doesn't give the Rogue One crew the chance to leave her. She leaves first.





	Luxury

**Author's Note:**

> For Jyn Erso Week on tumblr

It’s a luxury to stay, and she knows it. So at the first opportunity, she leaves.

 

The recovery from Scarif is long and arduous, much worse than she could have ever anticipated but then again, she had never expected to live. Cassian takes much longer to recover, sometimes she can’t bear to be in the same room with him, can’t bear to see his broken body or hear his screams in the night.

 

When she’s cleared from medbay, Cassian still confined to a bed, she seeks out Mon Mothma.

 

“I’ve fulfilled my end of the bargain.” she says, her gaze never faltering as she looks the former senator in the eye.

 

“You have, Jyn. And then some. We owe you a great debt.”

 

Jyn waves her arm. “Just give me a ship and some credits, and we’ll call it even.”

 

Mon Mothma bows her head, but she knows she wouldn’t be able to change Jyn’s mind. “Where will you go?”

 

Jyn looks away from Mon Mothma’s gaze, from the almost motherly concern evident in her eyes. “Just away from here.” she says under her breath.

 

\---

 

She leaves in the night, when most of the base is asleep. When her ship is finally in hyperspace she relaxes her grip on the controls, lets out a long breath. She didn’t give much thought to this, to the stretches of time when she would be alone. She doesn’t want her brain to remind her of what she’s just left behind, the possibility of a home, a family. She feels like she’s almost left a piece of her heart back on Yavin IV, with Cassian in the medbay, with Bodhi, Baze and Chirrut, and even Kaytoo. But she’s never had a good track record with family, with people she’s cared about. She’s always lost them in the end. This time around, she won’t let them leave. She’ll beat them to it.

 

She makes a wide swath across the galaxy, never staying in one place long, visiting or avoiding old haunts as needed. She resurrects Liana Hallik, laughing bitterly at the thought that she had left her behind on Wobani. It’s remarkably easy to become Liana again, easy to remember the pain, the loneliness. But her brain won’t let her forget, won’t let her forget Bodhi’s trusting eyes, Kay’s quips, Baze’s silent support, Chirrut’s comforting grip. It won’t let her forget Cassian, coming out of the haze and smoke to help her gain her absolution, holding her on that beach as they saw the end of their lives drawing near.

 

Maz doesn’t let her forget either.

 

She lands on Takodana in the middle of a rainfall, and being soaked to the skin just adds to her general mood. Maz nods her head at her as Jyn passes, but the look in Maz’s eyes makes Jyn avoid her for as long as she can.

 

Jyn is squeezing water out of her gear when Maz finally corners her.

 

“Whatever you’re running from this time,” she shuffles over to Jyn and places a hand on her knee, “maybe it’s time to stop?”

 

Jyn shakes her head. “You don’t know if I’m running from anything. What makes you think I’m always running?”

 

Maz props herself onto Jyn’s knees, removes her goggles and peers closely into Jyn’s eyes. “Because I see you, Jyn Erso.”

 

Jyn sucks in a breath. She had spent a year on Takodana before but Maz only knew her as Liana Hallik.

 

Maz sighs deeply, replaces her goggles over her eyes and climbs off Jyn’s lap. “Your heart, Jyn,” and she points to Jyn’s chest, “is as tough as that crystal around your neck.” And again, Jyn is caught off guard. She’s always kept her kyber crystal tucked into her shirt.

 

“Whatever you are running from,” and Maz is making her way towards the door, “maybe it’s time to stop.”

 

\---

 

The rains on Takodana last for days at a time, making it tricky for ships to take off or land. There isn’t much to do but play sabacc in the cantina, but Jyn has had enough of the raucous atmosphere. She takes refuge in her ship, and pulls up the holoimage that she’s watched almost every night now since she’s landed.

 

Cassian’s figure emerges, his face haggard and worn. She watches his lips move, watches him say it again and again.

 

_ Come home, Jyn. _

 

\---

 

It’s night again when she lands, the base is quiet, the hangar empty. She doesn’t expect to find anyone, so she’s surprised when she sees Bodhi standing at the end of the ramp of her ship. He doesn’t even wait for the ramp to descend completely before he jumps on and gives her a big hug.

 

“I’m glad you’re back.” he says, and she’s taken aback by the sincerity in his eyes.

 

“We all are.” comes a deep but friendly voice. Behind Bodhi she sees Baze, Chirrut standing next to him, and standing further back she sees Cassian and Kaytoo.

 

There’s a stutter in her chest, her vision clouds as tears threaten to spill down her face. She never believed she could have a family again, when she bonded with these people she never thought it would last. She was sure they would die there on Scarif, and when they didn’t, she never believed she belonged as part of their team. But here they all are, welcoming her warmly.

 

Cassian steps forward, and she steps towards him. He leans in ever so close, and the smile on his face is the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.

  
“Welcome home.”


End file.
